Bullying/Cliquing in Schools

[I`m Potato]

Hello all! I just wanted to collate experiences/opinions/ideas about what school environments around the world are like in terms of the frequency/intensity/extent of bullying. Bullying can be any form from mild to extreme, such as gossiping to actual physical bullying. Is bullying an issue prominently bad in your school? Or is it just something daily but mild like cliques are formed and people just don't really like each other and stay away? Or is your school mostly free of bullying/cliquing and everyone just live harmoniously under one roof?

I'd say my school is very good in terms of zero physical bullying. You can almost never find people fighting or physically assaulting others in here. However, I think cliques are extremely prominent and in fact destructive in terms of psychological bullying - because I can say that are a few of us that are evidently being isolated by the rest of the year group, hence the stereotypical "nerds" and "cool" cliques.

Yet, I'd say that tension between the two "cliques" are very covert. I don't think ANY teachers in school even notice such a situation in the school so the distance between the "nerds" and the "cool" cliques become further and further apart. It has in fact come to a point in which there is a certain repulsiveness between the two which I think is the most alarming issue. There'd be individuals from one group (the jokey ones) who are daring enough to pull out rude jokes (of course, the connotations are hidden so the teachers wouldn't notice that they are offensive) towards the other group. This is extremely sad, in my opinion.

Anyway, how is the situation of bullying/cliquing in your schools like? :\

[Proletariat]

I never see bullying, because I'm in the IB clique. lol. Ah jeez, I wish I hadn't typed that out and made myself sad reading that.

I'm sure bullying occurs frequently elsewhere in my school though. In fact, I know so; there was a ToK pres. on the topic last year. However, it just never happens in IB (we're smart enough to have mastered the art of subtlety.)

Cliques are a whole other beast. I don't know if it's possible to have a public high school in North American that is clique free. I would say no. My school is absolutely terrible for cliques, which is quite sad since we've got one of the most multicultural student demographic for the district. People at my school generally aren't smart enough to realize there are individuals outside of their own ethnic group. The closest you can come to a clique-free environment is actually the AP kids; our school has 6 times the AP students as IB. But even they can be disseminated into smaller cliques, like jocks and druggies, that overlap with the regular population.

[wombat123]

Well in my school there's a lot of active action against bullying. We have this club called Rock Solid that fights bullying, and once a year the drama class puts on a series of anti-bullying skits for the whole school to watch. We also have counselling and all that. I'm in the nerd clique though, so I don't tend to see so much bullying. I don't think I've ever had to endure bullying, and am grateful =). Unless of course, you count gossiping, in which case I wouldn't really know if people gossiped about me behind my back because, well, it's behind my back.

I've heard of fights in my school, and in one incident mace was used and the school was evacuated. I haven't seen of/heard of many fights though....honestly I think that they probably do happen, just off of school grounds. I told my friend the other day that I didn't think our school had a "popular" group or anything, but she laughed and said I didn't get out enough. Which is probably true. Well, so far my universe has been bullying-free, but I guess it must happen in my school, it's just that I don't see it.

[rummandcoke]

Bullying? No. I don't we had that either in my old school or my new one. But cliques? Hoo boy. The saddest part is that the cliques aren't even based on money/popularity, but more on nationality. =/ And it's not even the regular students, this is mostly within the IB students themselves. You'd have to walk in to my cafeteria, and you can almost instantly spot nearly all the groups that exist. It sucks, especially because some of the more popular(?) cliques, really do act quite rude and closed towards others. And again, this is within IB students.

I'm more of a free bird actually. I think I spend most of my lunches in the library, or in a little corner somewhere around the school with my graphing calculator.

[Jazmine]

Bullying? Yes that might happen but since IB is so, I dont want to say closed off but thats kinda it, from the rest of the school its hard to be aware of it.

Cliques? Yes. there are so many cliques around, people are seperated by race, gender, clubs, sports, IB, AP, Freshman, Sophmore, Junior, Senior, Drill Team, Band etc, the list can go on.

For the cliques in general they seem to mesh decently, meaning there are people in one clique who can easily join other cliques without problems.

In IB there are cliques but its not like they are set in stone. We all are close and we all can intermix quite well.

[Imma Be]

At my school the whole cliquing thing dosent happen.

You ahve friends and friends overlap different types of people, artsy, sporty, smart. But everybody seems to have so many different attibutes that you can't just label them into a group. cliq's to me=labels and labels belong on cans not on people lolz

as for bullying it happens in like middle school. In highschool you get mild forms of someone trying to put you down. But by the time highschool rolls around you know who you and what you are about. So stuff like that can't get at you (as much) anymore.

But in my school full IB students are so isolated that some of this may go on but we just don't notice it.

[Drake Glau]

We are the IB clique, and we have the theatre clique inside the IB clique. My school is just tons of groups of cliques...

As for bullying...I go to the most ghetto school in the district, fighting is normal and happens at least once a week. Disrespectful manners in the hall are common (thank god I'm giant, people don't try to push through me) umm, yea, it happens a lot

But I guess all it did was make me find my own group of friends that I'll keep all through college for sure and hopefully beyond (and I'm fairly certain that 2 of us get to go to the same college )

[JoeG]

My school has very little to no physical bullying at all. Although, there are some cliques around here and there. The cliques in my school aren't really iron-clad groups though. Although, this is only my perspective. I have great friends among many social groups, so I don't have any problems fitting in with any cliques that I encounter.

Since my school is a magnet school, they have zero-tolerance of any mis-behavioral activity. :|

Walter Glau, my school is also "Ghetto", it's in the middle of the largest one in my town.

Edited January 9, 2011 by JoeGuff

[Drake Glau]

Bah, my school needs to lay off the ghettoness then. Obviously they play it off too much if you're school does just fine.

[keepxdreaming:)]

My school has some bullying, although I can't say how much as I personally have never actually seen it happen. I'm sure it exists though. My school has a lot of cliques unfortunately; as the years have gone by though, the cliques have slightly disappeared in my grade but they're definitely still there. My school has had several assemblies regarding bullying and how it needs to be stopped. Although the stories told are truly sad, I wonder in reality how many people in my school actually listen to those stories and care.

[JoeG]

Even though it's not as bad as everyone in my school thinks, there's a bit of clicking between "IB" and "non-IB" (lol, I know) students. I really don't see this, everyone talks to each-other, and I don't discriminate against those who don't take IB classes. The only reason why this "clique" arose is because IB students were isolated from those who aren't in the Diploma Program because of the class schedules. This meant that we weren't able to see each-other in class besides Electives, and outside of class.

[I`m Potato]

My school has some bullying, although I can't say how much as I personally have never actually seen it happen. I'm sure it exists though. My school has a lot of cliques unfortunately; as the years have gone by though, the cliques have slightly disappeared in my grade but they're definitely still there. My school has had several assemblies regarding bullying and how it needs to be stopped. Although the stories told are truly sad, I wonder in reality how many people in my school actually listen to those stories and care.

If assemblies regarding bullying worked, then bullying wouldn't exist right now in society. Stories are sad and conjures sympathy but it lacks the empathetic factor. People are engaged with their emotions about how sad being victimized is but they are unable to empathize the trauma that it can cause. Who do you think knows best the experience of giving birth - the doctor or the mother? (Haha, random example ; )

Edited January 18, 2011 by I`m Potato

[fan]

Well there really isn't bull of any sort at my school. However there is what we call respect for the elders.lol As you move to IB1 and 2 the lower grades tend to respect you. well its kinda like a cycle. But we broke it when we started IB Even though there were IB2's we still acted like we were the oldest.lol But there isn't any bullying at our school. If you get reported your out and diploma gone

[Grumps]

"Well we have some psychology bullying but at least we don't have any physical bullying!" You all say that like it's a good thing.

To be honest I don't think physical bullying is the absolute evil some people make it out to be. It can certainly get out of hand, yes, but suppressing it like we are now is equally dangerous. Especially "physical bullying" which has to some extent extended to mutual scraps. In return for less physical bullying we have a number of negative side effects. More verbal abuse and psychological bullying which I believe is far worse. I'd rather my son get kicked in the ribs and punched in the face by a 6 foot 10, 250 pound man than be ridiculed by a gaggle of 80 pound 4th grade girls. Physical stuff, you get over. We've all stubbed or toes really bad or got cut or broke an arm- but after a couple of weeks it's gone forever. Embarrassment, even if it wasn't your fault, stays with you for a long time.

And I mean, a good scrap can be important to young lads (and some girls, I guess). Sometimes you just gotta know who's stronger, or else you have lasting tension. I had a buddy who got into a fight with this other guy. Big fight, everyone watched, both got bruised to crap (I can't remember who won). Later, they became bestest buddies.

Another thing is that when fighting is repressed, any actual fighting that breaks out is gonna be worse. People get killed all the time now from fist fights, never used to happen. People fought all the time in like the 50's, but they were gentlemanly about it. Now you have ****ing 12 years olds breaking out shanks for the smallest thing.

I say, let 'em get it out of their systems while they're young, weak, and controllable. If you have a couple people who get power mad in elementary, it's better than him ****ing killing a kid later in life.

[citizenoftheuniverse]

Our school has no physical bullying, but cliques are very prominent. Though I think that is a pretty good thing, since I am often the target of that bullyingish type behaviour and I am a pretty physically weak person , so pretty much everyone could beat me up if they so wished so psychological is a bit better. I think this because physical bullying is almost always accompanied by psychological bullying, while psychological bullying is usually just psychological. Though I have been the target of that behaviour, so I know that it hurts. When a clique first forms I am usually in it, but never has there been a clique that I have not been excluded from, even though usually I am still friends with some members still they can´t talk to me too much or they will be excluded too

[Mort]

Bullying happens everywhere but most of the time nobody notices. I have personal experience. When I lived in Canada (up till two years ago) I was very fat. This made it so that I couldn't go out with any girls and I didn't really like hanging out. I ended in my house watching anime until I slept, everyday. I would also be made fun of from time to time, but never was I physically bullied. Physical bullying is kind of dead, I'm not saying it doesn't happen but the percentage of physical bullying has decreased dramatically in the last decade.

Now I'm living in Iran and going to Tehran International School. Not the best of schools, mostly because there aren't any girls (Schools in Iran for boys and girls are separate). Bullying at my school is mostly done by the grade 12 students, which consist of like four people. They mostly take a soccer ball and shoot it at people. I get the ball and shoot it back at them. Whats the worse they can do? They aren't man enough to even try to pounce on you. But beside those four individuals, our school is peaceful. We have popular kids but they don't harm nobody.

Edited April 16, 2011 by Mort

[Brian Hunt]

Personally, I have never seen bullying. My school is incredibly diverse and the most ghetto of the district but we don't have clique problems. Everyone has friends that they gravitate to but they all have friends that fall outside of the clique that they may seem to be associated with. The clique problem just doesn't fit with our school. For example, I am a varsity football player, mathlete, IB nerd, thespian, and choir kid. There isn't a clique to exactly fit this. It's a common thing to do a wide range of activities such as I do at my school. Where difference in race, religion, personality, and many other factors seem to seperate students at other schools, for some odd reason it brings my school together.

[Munsif]

Well for us its pretty commonplace, because it's a boarding school where I do IB.

Most of the 'bullying' I've faced are jibes related to your mannerisms, sports you play, your performance in class, where you come from..etc

Yeah, because dorms are separate for guys and gals, the instances of bullying or ganging up sometimes run high when you got 12-15 guys each with a different temperament on the same floor, but physical bouts are just fought and forgotten.

But sometimes it does get over the line. I remember being under fire for having gotten a fellow student into disciplinary trouble with the IT dept. becuase he'd hacked all my Internet accounts (repeatedly over 2 days, which was pure fun for him) and messed about with them. got me plenty of criticism and namecalling.

I know it can really hurt at first (It did for me), especially when you're not used to taking a jibe every minute of the day.

It's all about standing up for yourself at the right time. Because at 17, you can't really expect someone to always be there to help you. At least that is what I believe after 4 months in a residential school. :\