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Are you an introvert? Do you think it's related to depression and anti-socialism?


Mahuta ♥

Introversion  

86 members have voted

  1. 1. How long have you been an introvert?

    • Since I can remember.
    • Since I started growing up (i.e beginning of teenage)
    • Not so long, this is very new.
    • I am not an introvert, but I have a feeling I am turning into one.
    • I am not an introvert.


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So I happened to ask someone this question:

"Whats the correct word to describe someone who's thinking about somethings and no one knows what they are and prefers to keep to himself?", and I got the answer "Introvert"

I looked it up and the definition was

"Contrary to what most people think, an introvert is not simply a person who is shy. In fact, being shy has little to do with being an introvert! Shyness has an element of apprehension, nervousness and anxiety, and while an introvert may also be shy, introversion itself is not shyness. Basically, an introvert is a person who is energized by being alone and whose energy is drained by being around other people. Introverts are more concerned with the inner world of the mind. They enjoy thinking, exploring their thoughts and feelings. They often avoid social situations because being around people drains their energy. This is true even if they have good social skills. After being with people for any length of time, such as at a party, they need time alone to "recharge." When introverts want to be alone, it is not, by itself, a sign of depression. It means that they either need to regain their energy from being around people or that they simply want the time to be with their own thoughts. Being with people, even people they like and are comfortable with, can prevent them from their desire to be quietly introspective. Being introspective, though, does not mean that an introvert never has conversations. However, those conversations are generally about ideas and concepts, not about what they consider the trivial matters of social small talk."

I felt so relieved because I finally found a word that explains exactly how I feel. I am not sure if there are a lot of introverts around, but I am wondering if anyone else feels this way?

I found the test below in a psychology website, and it may not be scientific and all, but almost every single point applied to me, so it should give you an idea if you're wondering:

A Test for Introverted Personality Traits

Answer true or false to the following questions about introversion and extroversion:

1. I like to have long, uninterrupted periods to work on projects, rather than small chunks.

2. I sometimes rehearse things before speaking, occasionally writing notes to myself.

3. I like to listen more than talk.

4. People sometimes think I’m quiet, mysterious, aloof or calm.

5. I usually need to think before I respond or speak.

6. I like to share special occasions with just one or two people, rather than have a big celebration.

7. I tend to notice details many people don’t see.

8. If two people have just had an argument, I feel the tension in the air.

9. If I say I’ll do something, I almost always do it.

10. I feel anxious if I have a deadline or pressure.

11. I can zone out if too much is going on.

12. I like to watch an activity for awhile before joining in.

13. I form lasting relationships.

14. I don’t like to interrupt others; I don’t like to be interrupted.

15. When I take in lots of information, it takes me awhile to sort it out.

16. I don’t like overstimulating environments.

17. I sometimes have strong reactions to smells, tastes, foods, weather, and noise.

18. I am creative and/or imaginative.

19. I feel drained after social situations, even when I enjoy myself.

20. I prefer to be introduced rather than having to introduce others.

21. I often feel uncomfortable in new surroundings.

22. I can become grouchy if I’m around people or activities for too long.

23. I often dread returning phone calls.

24. I like people to come to my home, but I don’t like them to stay a long time.

25. I find my mind sometimes goes blank when I meet people or when I am asked to speak unexpectedly.

26. I talk slowly or have gaps in my words, especially if I’m tired or if I’m trying to think and speak at once.

27. I don’t think of acquaintances as close friends.

28. I feel as if I can’t show other people my ideas until they’re fully formulated.

29. Other people may surprise me by thinking I’m smarter than I am.

Scoring:

20-29 “true” responses means you’re a true introvert (like me!). “Only deep relationships measure up as friendships and you use them to relax. You need to mentally rest throughout the day, even after enjoyable activities. Because you will draw a blank under pressure, prepare for meetings, talks, and even parties beforehand. Accept your nature and learn to politely fend off energy-draining people.”

10-19 “true” responses means you’re both introverted and extroverted. “You sometimes feel torn between the desire to dance in the streets and walk alone on the beach. Notice this, so you can keep your energy consistent. You judge yourself through your thoughts and feelings, and through others, leaving you with a broad view that is sometimes difficult to straddle.”

1-9 “true” responses means you’re an extrovert. “You relish variety, have lots of ‘close, personal’ friends and will chat with complete strangers. Your stimulation is all external, so you talk, think, and act quickly. As you reach midlife, however, you may need to take a break from the high life to reflect, even though it goes against your nature.”

It is said that an introvert is not an anti-social person nor a depressed one. They are simply..and introvert. What do you think about that? The answer may differ from one person to another depending on how much of an introvert they are. For example, and introvert will say, yes introversion has nothing to do with me being anti-social or depressed, whereas someone who's not an introvert will insist that if someone wants to stay alone a lot., avoid social situations..etc..etc, they are at least anti-social.

I really want to get some opinions..so tell me what you think.

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well, i'm an introvert and i don't enjoy being around large numbers of people. Like what the definition said, when i'm at a party or a large number of people, i try to escape so i can be by myself and organize my thoughts. I've always been that way. The shy thing as well. And what you said was true. People think that if you're an introvert, you're anti-social and proud of yourself, well that's what they think over here. It's very weird. If you're an introvert, they judge you a lot up to a point that it comes annoying. Anyway, what i think of introverts is that people just want to be alone with their thoughts and think about certain things and being around people hinders their thinking capacity and therefore, they'll lack concentration. It's not bad being an introvert but non-introverts will see it that way. That's what i think.

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I believe I am an introvert, but I scored 19-20, perhaps that means I'm normal-ish and have introverted qualities. I do agree that an introvert isn't necessarily a depressed person, and perhaps not even anti-social, but I think these things could be closely related to an introvert. Although it is believed that an introvert is not necessarily the commonly believed things, I feel that they do tend to be, because the average person may "experience" introverts with these qualities by mere observation. That is not a strong argument, as their opinions are hugely biased and therefore inaccurate, but personally, I do experience depression (more than others I think) and I tend to be anti-social, because I cannot strive (survive lol) in a group setting, especially with people whom I am not familiar.

According to your definition, it seems to me that because an introvert gets their energy when alone, and is able to be introspective better when they are alone, they would rather enjoy and prefer to be alone. Of course, there must be some kind of balance between this and having a social life, and I think as long as the person has friends and is not an extreme introvert, they aren't a depressed person.

However, I believe one of the qualities of being human is the desire to be loved and noticed. Ultimately, all a normal human being wants is to be happy. This ties into social relationships with peers, friends and anyone else in the introvert's life. But because an introvert tends to prefer to be alone rather than with other people, it can be argued that they are relatively antisocial. As a result, it is entirely possible that in order to be happy, an introvert is antisocial. As long as the healthy introvert feels that they are being noticed and loved to their own liking, that is where they are likely to draw the line in their social relationships with others.

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Re: introversion and depression/being anti-social, I think it's quite probable that there's some kind of correlation.

With being anti-social it very much depends on the definition. Generally I would say that it probably does mean you are anti-social in some respects (that you attend less social gatherings and events) but equally anti-social also has behavioural implications and actually provided it's not constant, many introverted people can have a pretty healthy social calendar. A lot of it is probably to do with group size. If an introverted person prefers to be in the company of a small number of close friends versus a large gathering of people they know less well, they're technically speaking still involved in social interaction either way. The main difference is the scale.

As for depression, there are a few factors in this that I can think of. The first one is a sociological issue in many respects - that in modern society, having many contacts and being a party animal are often considered signs of success. An introverted person is therefore by definition less successful in 'life' generally than others. The second is that taking the time to think about things and reflect can also force the consideration and analysis of things which might perhaps not trouble you if you instead spent that time interacting with other people. Reflection allows a great deal more space for self-criticism and self-indulgent thinking which could quite reasonably make a person feel gloomy! Equally self-criticism and reflection are extremely valuable qualities and it's very clear (and often embarrassing!) when people lack them - the irony is that not having these faculties means they'll probably never realise or at least not be much troubled.

It's all somewhat theoretical though. There are plenty of extroverts who suffer from depression. Probably fewer who could be blamed of being anti-social, although certainly a lot of extroverts who could be said to have 'anti-social behaviour'! You're probably not going to find a great number of introverted hooligans, for instance.

Edit: I forgot to add, I'm certainly an introvert-type personality (and to my knowledge always have been) and score roughly 20 from that list. Ironically the thing which has made me feel most sad and glum in the past is lack of social contact!

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Hmm, I might consider myself an introvert, as I love to spend time by myself, organising thoughts and thinking about my life at the moment or at the past. Sometimes when there is too much people around, when I´m during my "me time" I tend to get pissed off. I like quiet times that provoke deep reflection that help me revise my life. I find taking walks around the city, or around a park a way of interiorizing myself. I love to watch the movements of the city as well as nature. One thing that I enjoy is riding buses while listening to music, and let the thoughts flow. So yeah, I´m pretty much of an introvert. :D

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I scored 27...

I believe I am an introvert, but I scored 19-20, perhaps that means I'm normal-ish and have introverted qualities. I do agree that an introvert isn't necessarily a depressed person, and perhaps not even anti-social, but I think these things could be closely related to an introvert. Although it is believed that an introvert is not necessarily the commonly believed things, I feel that they do tend to be, because the average person may "experience" introverts with these qualities by mere observation. That is not a strong argument, as their opinions are hugely biased and therefore inaccurate, but personally, I do experience depression (more than others I think) and I tend to be anti-social, because I cannot strive (survive lol) in a group setting, especially with people whom I am not familiar.

According to your definition, it seems to me that because an introvert gets their energy when alone, and is able to be introspective better when they are alone, they would rather enjoy and prefer to be alone. Of course, there must be some kind of balance between this and having a social life, and I think as long as the person has friends and is not an extreme introvert, they aren't a depressed person.

However, I believe one of the qualities of being human is the desire to be loved and noticed. Ultimately, all a normal human being wants is to be happy. This ties into social relationships with peers, friends and anyone else in the introvert's life. But because an introvert tends to prefer to be alone rather than with other people, it can be argued that they are relatively antisocial. As a result, it is entirely possible that in order to be happy, an introvert is antisocial. As long as the healthy introvert feels that they are being noticed and loved to their own liking, that is where they are likely to draw the line in their social relationships with others.

I don't know to be honest. See with someone like me (very introverted) wouldn't agree with that. I am not anti-social, or at least I dont think I am. If I stay alone for like..weeks then I do get depressed. But staying alone for like..5-6 days is something I long for. I have friends, I have best friends and I am said to be very out-going. However, almost every single thing said in the definition and the list applies to me. I am out-going sometimes and I do enjoy being with friends, but I get so worn out from the 'effort' and try to get home asap. I don't know how to explain it, I am just trying to explain that anti-socialism and introversion aren't directly related. You can find someone who's not an introvert but anti-social.

Re: introversion and depression/being anti-social, I think it's quite probable that there's some kind of correlation.

With being anti-social it very much depends on the definition. Generally I would say that it probably does mean you are anti-social in some respects (that you attend less social gatherings and events) but equally anti-social also has behavioural implications and actually provided it's not constant, many introverted people can have a pretty healthy social calendar. A lot of it is probably to do with group size. If an introverted person prefers to be in the company of a small number of close friends versus a large gathering of people they know less well, they're technically speaking still involved in social interaction either way. The main difference is the scale.

As for depression, there are a few factors in this that I can think of. The first one is a sociological issue in many respects - that in modern society, having many contacts and being a party animal are often considered signs of success. An introverted person is therefore by definition less successful in 'life' generally than others. The second is that taking the time to think about things and reflect can also force the consideration and analysis of things which might perhaps not trouble you if you instead spent that time interacting with other people. Reflection allows a great deal more space for self-criticism and self-indulgent thinking which could quite reasonably make a person feel gloomy! Equally self-criticism and reflection are extremely valuable qualities and it's very clear (and often embarrassing!) when people lack them - the irony is that not having these faculties means they'll probably never realise or at least not be much troubled.

I don't understand why. :S Why less successful? Unless you mean in terms of out current society only. But in general I don't see the relationship between the two. I don't think introverts feel unsuccessful just because they like to be alone certain times. However one thing I am going to say about this is that I truly believe in terms of stress, introverted people are more likely to get extremely stressed out about a certain issue, problem, exams..etc because they don't want any one to talk to about this so they try to solve it on their own..which only makes things worse.

Hmm, I might consider myself an introvert, as I love to spend time by myself, organising thoughts and thinking about my life at the moment or at the past. Sometimes when there is too much people around, when I´m during my "me time" I tend to get pissed off. I like quiet times that provoke deep reflection that help me revise my life. I find taking walks around the city, or around a park a way of interiorizing myself. I love to watch the movements of the city as well as nature. One thing that I enjoy is riding buses while listening to music, and let the thoughts flow. So yeah, I´m pretty much of an introvert. :D

Hmm how much did you score? That's something I never like to do haha. For me, staying alone means staying home alone with my laptop and internet connection with my thoughts and mood. I hate going out around the city or park or anywhere else tbh, when I am out whether alone or with my family, I tend to get things done quickly so I can get home as soon as possible.

Riding something while listening to music, yes. I do that..a lot, that's like my thing.

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As for depression, there are a few factors in this that I can think of. The first one is a sociological issue in many respects - that in modern society, having many contacts and being a party animal are often considered signs of success. An introverted person is therefore by definition less successful in 'life' generally than others.

Less successful due to the part I just put in bold. People who are always going, always social, have many contacts and friends etc. - gregarious people. They are billed as the image of success. The opposite qualities are not celebrated at all, for all that they too have perks.

However one thing I am going to say about this is that I truly believe in terms of stress, introverted people are more likely to get extremely stressed out about a certain issue, problem, exams..etc because they don't want any one to talk to about this so they try to solve it on their own..which only makes things worse.

Personally I would disagree with this. I'm not really sure that tendency to get stressed correlates with being introverted versus extroverted. Equally to your own argument, you could also put forward that introverted people are more used to dealing with things alone and being able to cope with pressures as they do it on a much more frequent basis. I find myself less stressed than equivalent extroverted people by these things! I've got plenty of experience in relying on myself to be able to deal with stress, ahah. I think that being stressed out by pressure is a facet of something which isn't necessarily much related to extroversion/introversion. You can be one or the other but still be stressed/chilled. Also, as I've got a group of very close friends/contacts versus a larger group of more vague ones, I actually would say that I have more people with whom to share my concerns and worries. People who I know would listen to me and who care about what happens to me, versus people who I know to such a superficial degree that they're more or less just telling me what they think I want to hear. Extroverts might not have this.

In other words, I don't think that you can universalise stress with introversion/extroversion. I don't think it necessarily matches either one or the other.

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As for depression, there are a few factors in this that I can think of. The first one is a sociological issue in many respects - that in modern society, having many contacts and being a party animal are often considered signs of success. An introverted person is therefore by definition less successful in 'life' generally than others.

Less successful due to the part I just put in bold. People who are always going, always social, have many contacts and friends etc. - gregarious people. They are billed as the image of success. The opposite qualities are not celebrated at all, for all that they too have perks.

However one thing I am going to say about this is that I truly believe in terms of stress, introverted people are more likely to get extremely stressed out about a certain issue, problem, exams..etc because they don't want any one to talk to about this so they try to solve it on their own..which only makes things worse.

Personally I would disagree with this. I'm not really sure that tendency to get stressed correlates with being introverted versus extroverted. Equally to your own argument, you could also put forward that introverted people are more used to dealing with things alone and being able to cope with pressures as they do it on a much more frequent basis. I find myself less stressed than equivalent extroverted people by these things! I've got plenty of experience in relying on myself to be able to deal with stress, ahah. I think that being stressed out by pressure is a facet of something which isn't necessarily much related to extroversion/introversion. You can be one or the other but still be stressed/chilled. Also, as I've got a group of very close friends/contacts versus a larger group of more vague ones, I actually would say that I have more people with whom to share my concerns and worries. People who I know would listen to me and who care about what happens to me, versus people who I know to such a superficial degree that they're more or less just telling me what they think I want to hear. Extroverts might not have this.

In other words, I don't think that you can universalise stress with introversion/extroversion. I don't think it necessarily matches either one or the other.

True. But I am saying that it may be more likely. I mean if two people are stressed out one an extrovert and the other an introvert, the former would let his stress out on different things and by talking to so many people, where the latter may be in 'that' time and is alone, in which case, they are going to get a bit more stressed out and confused about what to do next. Yes just like you, I have 4 very close friends that I talk to, but being the kind of an introvert I am, I don't even talk to them about problems unless I am really really in trouble. So I guess it depends on how much of an introvert you are. Some (like you) have that small group of close friends that you share your concerns and worry with, where as others (like me), don't really enjoy sharing my worries and concerns with anyone whatsoever unless I am in desperate need. Being this way made me familiar with dealing with things alone, you're right about that. But being able to deal with problems on my own, doesn't mean I wont get stressed out about them first.

Me and you are two different degrees of introversion, which is good I have something to try and become. To me it has always been" "Okay I don't want to be an introvert anymore, whats the other option? Extrovert, no way! Just stay as an introvert". Now it's like "What are other options? Well..an extrovert, or a lighter degree of introversion. Aah the second sounds good!" XD. You get my point yeah?

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  • 5 weeks later...

Did you try taking the test above? XD Being someone who loves being surrounded by big groups of people is good, but for a long amount of time sucks the energy out of anybody..even extroverts. Hey..you may not be an introvert after all. As an introvert, I hate being surrounded by big groups of people..more than 5 people starts tiring me no matter what the situation is (e.g this would apply for my uncle's wedding too, the whole time I was thinking about the moment where it's over and I am back to my 'bubble').

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I am an introvert. The definition provided in the first post describes me completely. No, introverts are not depressed and/or anti-social. I can communicate fine with other people, I can crack jokes with my friends, laugh out loud etc. and I am sure other introverts are the same or more-or-less similar.

But of course, I would much prefer being alone or at least in a quiet place (like a library) rather than in a place full of people, like shopping malls or bustling restaurants or clubs, although I do not mind the company of my closer friends or family. I prefer spending time with close friends and family members rather than meeting new people, although again, I would not mind getting to know others.

I find spending time to organize my thoughts very stress-relieving. I find solace in my own private universe, away from the rambunctiousness of the outside world. I love writing and hope to become an author one day; perhaps my introversion motivates me to write.

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Well, I really don't think introverts are anti-social/depressed. And I took the test; am not one, so my views are not biased in the least. I do think I have a hint of an introvert in me, tho, some of the characteristics are totally mine. I think that introverts in society get more time than other people to explore their minds and hence tend to be more creative than other people- that's a good thing, cos they do a lot with the time they have to themselves. :hmmm:

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I looked it up and the definition was

"Contrary to what most people think, an introvert is not simply a person who is shy. In fact, being shy has little to do with being an introvert! Shyness has an element of apprehension, nervousness and anxiety, and while an introvert may also be shy, introversion itself is not shyness. Basically, an introvert is a person who is energized by being alone and whose energy is drained by being around other people. Introverts are more concerned with the inner world of the mind. They enjoy thinking, exploring their thoughts and feelings. They often avoid social situations because being around people drains their energy. This is true even if they have good social skills. After being with people for any length of time, such as at a party, they need time alone to "recharge." When introverts want to be alone, it is not, by itself, a sign of depression. It means that they either need to regain their energy from being around people or that they simply want the time to be with their own thoughts. Being with people, even people they like and are comfortable with, can prevent them from their desire to be quietly introspective. Being introspective, though, does not mean that an introvert never has conversations. However, those conversations are generally about ideas and concepts, not about what they consider the trivial matters of social small talk."

I scored 27...

I believe I am an introvert, but I scored 19-20, perhaps that means I'm normal-ish and have introverted qualities. I do agree that an introvert isn't necessarily a depressed person, and perhaps not even anti-social, but I think these things could be closely related to an introvert. Although it is believed that an introvert is not necessarily the commonly believed things, I feel that they do tend to be, because the average person may "experience" introverts with these qualities by mere observation. That is not a strong argument, as their opinions are hugely biased and therefore inaccurate, but personally, I do experience depression (more than others I think) and I tend to be anti-social, because I cannot strive (survive lol) in a group setting, especially with people whom I am not familiar.

According to your definition, it seems to me that because an introvert gets their energy when alone, and is able to be introspective better when they are alone, they would rather enjoy and prefer to be alone. Of course, there must be some kind of balance between this and having a social life, and I think as long as the person has friends and is not an extreme introvert, they aren't a depressed person.

However, I believe one of the qualities of being human is the desire to be loved and noticed. Ultimately, all a normal human being wants is to be happy. This ties into social relationships with peers, friends and anyone else in the introvert's life. But because an introvert tends to prefer to be alone rather than with other people, it can be argued that they are relatively antisocial. As a result, it is entirely possible that in order to be happy, an introvert is antisocial. As long as the healthy introvert feels that they are being noticed and loved to their own liking, that is where they are likely to draw the line in their social relationships with others.

I don't know to be honest. See with someone like me (very introverted) wouldn't agree with that. I am not anti-social, or at least I dont think I am. If I stay alone for like..weeks then I do get depressed. But staying alone for like..5-6 days is something I long for. I have friends, I have best friends and I am said to be very out-going. However, almost every single thing said in the definition and the list applies to me. I am out-going sometimes and I do enjoy being with friends, but I get so worn out from the 'effort' and try to get home asap. I don't know how to explain it, I am just trying to explain that anti-socialism and introversion aren't directly related. You can find someone who's not an introvert but anti-social.

You have to consider the true validity of the test and the definition. Who knows, it could be wrong! What you are saying is true; there are people like that. But bringing my argument to a more personal level, you've said you're introverted, as almost every single thing in that list and definition applies to you. I'm going to assert my point on you (no pressure, lol) because drawing from the definition, introverts are, well introspective, and that is their trademark feature. Because they are so concerned with the thoughts of mind and their feelings, they sacrifice their potential social relationships just to recharge and get their energy back. That is why I think they tend to be alone.

I think we have to agree on something first though, and that is our definition of antisocial. I believe mine was not being as socially active as other people, and I think yours was not being socially active when put under a social situation. That is respectable, but we need some universal definition, because this is why we are disagreeing with each other. That being said, I think your points are valid for your own definition. ;)

Time to find some common ground...

I'd also like to point out how depression may be linked into introversion. Yes, they are not directly related I agree, and according to the definition, being introverted does not mean they are depressed in itself. That is true, but no one is just introverted. We are so complicated that it'd take about a million definitions to describe who we are. That being said, if we are introverted and more, then we would already have some starting point as a lead to depression, as being introverted couples with our other unique qualities. That is why they might tend to be depressed too, and that should be the reality of the ideas under consideration; we are not just introverted; we are so many other things and introverted. And people might just second guess us being they see just because we are introverted, we do have those stereotypical roles they see of us. And in part they are right.

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You have to consider the true validity of the test and the definition. Who knows, it could be wrong! What you are saying is true; there are people that. But bringing my argument to a more personal level, you've said you're introverted, as almost every single thing in that list and definition applies to you. I'm going to assert my point on you (no pressure, lol) because drawing from the definition, introverts are, well introspective, and that is there trademark feature. Because they are so concerned in the with the mind, thoughts and feelings, they sacrifice their potential social relationships just to recharge and get their energy back. That is why I think they tend to be alone.

See, if you are looking at it from the outside, the last part may sound right. But when I read it I thought "I am not sacrificing anything", in other words, I don't feel that way. I don't know how to explain it, but I don't feel that I am missing out of anything by being the way I am.

I think we have to agree on something first though, and that is our definition of antisocial. I believe mine was not being as socially active as other people, and I think yours was not being socially active when put under a social situation. That is respectable, but we need some universal definition, because this is why we are disagreeing with each other. That being said, I think your points are valid for your own definition. ;)

Yes, the difference in our definition to change things. I just searched about introversion and apparently, it's a term developed by Carl Jung and then improved by Myers Brigg. They developed a set of questions; yes or no answers as personality type test. The results are calculated according to a specific criteria. I got curious when you said, it could be wrong, so decided to take that too:

"You are:

  • very expressed introvert
  • slightly expressed intuitive personality
  • slightly expressed thinking personality
  • moderately expressed judging personality"

Try that one.

Time to find some common ground...

I'd also like to point out how depression may be linked into introversion. Yes, they are not directly related I agree, and according to the definition, being introverted does not mean they are depressed in itself. That is true, but no one is just introverted. We are so complicated that it'd take about a million definition to describe who we are. That being said, if we are introverted and more, then we would already have some starting point as a lead to depression, as being introverted couples with our other unique qualities. That is why they might tend to be depressed too, and that is the reality of the ideas under considered; we are not just introverted; we are so many other things and introverted. And people might just second guess us being they see just because we are introverted, we do have those stereotypical roles they see of us. And in part they are right.

In my opinion, depression could be a result of excessive exaggerated introversion, so I guess we agree on that. Since you seem to feel the same way as I did, I am going to try and express my opinion. For me, I am an introvert in general, so the characteristics and descriptions almost always apply. However, staying too long in extreme introversion, does get me really down and blue and close to 'depression', and in that situation, I totally understand why people may think introversion is directly related to depression. I don't know if I am going to say this the correct way, but in introversion, you do switch from one mood to another, and it's different with introverts. We tend to sometimes be alone in a calm place thinking, doing something, watching something..etc and having the time of our lives (not really, but you get what I mean), really content and don't think/fee; we're missing on anything at all. Other times, we feel so worn out (not physically), down and "sad"..(I cant find the right word) and sort of..just want to sit there alone without anyone asking you "are you okay?", "what's wrong? Why are you mad?"..it's like "urgh..im not mad! Just leave me alone..I'll go back to the other mood on my own".

The fact that the society doesn't understand the whole "I am not mad..I just wanna remain quiet for a while" thing really really wares me out. Like..so much I feel like crying. This happens to me a lot, I would be sitting with my close friends..joking, laughing, having so much fun..then I suddenly fall silent and my mood changes 180 degrees. Did someone make my angry? No. Did I remember something? No..not at all. Then why am I suddenly all grumpy? I am not grumpy. Why am I like this then? I have got no idea. I really don't know why, it's like I suddenly feel so tired and exhausted I don't feel like talking any more, and I get so annoyed when someone keeps asking if I am okay and why I am acting this way. Often, I am obliged to lie and say something like "Oh I just remembered X"..or.. "I am just worried about exams", what's worst is..it doesn't end there! They'll try to make me feel better and get you to stop worrying about exams (which I am not the least worried about).

Okay, just realized I have been talking too much about myself. But you get my point yeah? If anyone thinks this is not introversion at all..please say.. I want your opinion. If this happens to you often, let me know I am not the only one.

You know, I truly believe introverts could be so happy with their lives, satisfied and not the least bit tending towards depression. The people around them will determine if they remain that way. You said you're introvert, imagine if you were in my place and that was happening to you..how would you feel? Wouldn't you feel if that goes on day after day, you'll eventually become 'depressed' (or a better word I can't find) the whole time?

The world needs to understand how introverts think! Pretty touch since they're intro-verts..but really, it makes things so much harder! At least I know it does for me.

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  • 4 weeks later...

The thing is I'm sometimes surrounded by people, but especially when they are too* many, I just see defects on the group - I start thinking of how much I hate the world we've created, the sort of society... But I join them, being sarcastic til the point I seem to fit in their circle. Nye. Still, most of the time I prefer to invite them politely to go straight to Hell and come back with my music or readings =)

But, even if I spend most of the break times alone - or I'd like to, but people are SO heavy and patronizing... -, the thing is when I went out, when I'm really looking for new people, I feel confident and I just make the weirdest friends in the creepiest places: hobos in the city, prostitutes near to the mall...

I guess I'm a weirdo, but... am I anti-social? I'd like to think I'm just anti- a special kinda sociality (the ones I'm forced to live with: parents, class mates, teachers...), which makes me an introvert in determinated circumstances =)

PS: Do you have a clue what time is it here? Nye, if I were not that sleepy I'll continue with the high* topic you're discussing, but now I feel like going to bed and do never wake up again... So wish me luck! =)

Edited by Daniel A2F
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  • 2 weeks later...

Recently I've found an interesting book about introverts: Quiet: the Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain. Basically, what the author is trying to say is that introverts are undervalued in today's society. Here is a link about the book if you are interested: http://www.npr.org/2012/01/30/145930229/quiet-please-unleashing-the-power-of-introverts?sc=tw&cc=share

I am also an introvert myself, I prefer to have fewer companions, but hanging out with large groups of friends is cool with me too. Like the previous poster suggested, I agree that in friendships, the quality matters, not the quantity. :D I think all of us contain both introverted and extroverted quaIities inside, just depends on to what extent we tend to be either of them. I think it is a gross generalization to say that all introverts are depressed and anti-social through. I tend to know some people who are very extroverted, with tons of friends, cheerful and talkative all the time, but who goes through depression; it was something like smile-syndrome I don't exactly remember. Plus, I don't think success should be determined by whether you are an introvert or not. Considerable amount of famous people were introvers. Like, Einstein, Chopin, Spielberg, Isaac Newtonw, Darwin.,etc. However, I'm confident there are tons of famous extroverts too. I'm not saying that one of the two are superior or inferior to one another. There are just so many variables to consider when we want to make generalizations on either of them. But, perhaps our society needs to start appreciating introverts more. But, perhaps I do sound a bit defensive because I am an introvert myself! XD Haha, this is just what I think!

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I am definitely an introvert (scored 27 in the test) and I am one ever since I remember. I have never had more that 4-5 real friends, but I'm really bound to the ones I have. That being said, from my life experience I can confirm most of the thoughts of Sandwich. I think that by being an introvert I am a bit of anti-social, and I guess in some cases being introvert and anti-social bind in a sort of viscious circle. As you don't enjoy being with people, you rather avoid them, by which you don't gain any experience of how to talk/get to know/approach people, and then you start avoiding people just because you feel shy and uncomfortable to start any conversation. This has happened to me numerous times and thus I can say I am both an introvert and anti-social...

And yes, I think that being an introvert can cause some obstacles in the future career. This is because most of the employers expect you to have well developed so called "soft skills", and often a part of the application is an arranged meeting where you're supposed to socialise with others. And obviously this socialising on demand would be much harder for an introvert person who is not used to being in a large, loud, and often drunk group of people.

As for correlation to depression... in my opinion introversion might be one of the aspcts leading to depression, but surely not the only one, and what's more, in some cases it can even prevent such states. But from the begining: as an introvert you are much more sensitive to what happens around you. Also, as you are not permanently bothered by what others say, you analyse all the facts in your mind consuming plenty of time for it, which, as Sandwich said, can lead to extensive self-critisism, and a state of self-consciousness.

And now there are two options: 1) you are too shy to share your doubts and problems with anyone, which can lead to increasing them in your mind, destroying your self-esteem and thus a depression, or 2) you have just a handful of trustworthy friends whom you know for really long time and you feel you can tell them just about anything you can't cope with. This helps handling the pressure of reality, and may prevent the state of depression. Hence it can't be stated the introversion is bound to depression but neither can we say that these thing are completely separate.

I have never suffered from depression myself, but I have endured numerous situations which significantly affected my self-esteem, while many others would hardly have noticed that something happened, and I can understand some people can give up to this feeling.

All I've written above is is based only on my own experience and I can't give you any scientific reasons for my conclusions, and nor can I say that this is a rule. This is just what I think...

Edit: The fact of this response being so long and incomprehensible. is also a sign of being introvert. I had thought of it too long and wanted to pass too many ideas at the same time XD And, obviously, I'm not as shy on the internet forum as in reality...

Edited by Slovakov
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