Guest iber2468 Posted January 26, 2008 Report Share Posted January 26, 2008 (edited) How do u pronounce Menage A Trois?Is it Monaxia Tua?It's Men-UH-ge AH twAH.My dear friend Brian: Writing a TOK essay is like being constipated - it hurts like hell and you produce c rap very, very slowlyIt's now world-famous on http://www.ibquotes.com/top(o_O why is the c--- word censored?! We're in IB, everything we write is c rap) Edited January 26, 2008 by Crystal Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Mayler Posted February 22, 2008 Report Share Posted February 22, 2008 Here's one from my physics teacher:"If it feels weird then it's physics, If it feels good then it's biology or something else" Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyro Posted February 22, 2008 Report Share Posted February 22, 2008 Chem Teacher- "This is the hardest test you'll ever take in your life. You're going to fail, but don't worry you're suppose to fail"Chem Teacher- *referring to a lab he was doing* "We're not going to do part D. I read the label on the chemical and it said 'do not breath in, if touches skin get help immediently', I don't want to be fired." About ten minutes later. "Let's do part D, I want to see what happens." Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
IBStuck Posted February 22, 2008 Report Share Posted February 22, 2008 when ever we do a lab report, and we ask our chem teacher for help or if changing this one thing might be a good idea he says "you're scietist" and that is it. we are making shirts he says it so much along with the phrase "keep in mind".... but he makes a fun face if we put "keep in mind" in our lab reports Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Posted February 23, 2008 Report Share Posted February 23, 2008 "They are IB gases. They work well under preasure."IB Psych Teacher Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
tvd7 Posted February 23, 2008 Report Share Posted February 23, 2008 Math Teacher: "These are the kind of problems that excite me. They make my wife jealous." (speaking about modulus finctions)Physics Teacher: "Here's your set of problems. It took me 3 minutes, it should take you about 30..." Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ruan Chun Xian Posted February 23, 2008 Report Share Posted February 23, 2008 (o_O why is the c--- word censored?! We're in IB, everything we write is c rap) Lc censored it for some bizarre reason. But yeah it is a bit too trivial to be censored. Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Mayler Posted February 24, 2008 Report Share Posted February 24, 2008 Student in Pre IB when discussing why she's taking biology HL "I'm taking biology HL so I can get a better sex life" Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyro Posted February 24, 2008 Report Share Posted February 24, 2008 (edited) I get it. I'm also studying Chem and Physics. Edited February 24, 2008 by Tyro Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
flsweetheart422 Posted February 25, 2008 Report Share Posted February 25, 2008 On Valentine's Day IB Psychology SL, my teacher thought it would be cool to teach us the psychology of attraction. He mentioned "When you are with someone you really love, your pupils dialiate. Its a scientific fact"Student: Oh that makes so much sense! I was at my boyfriend's house the other night and he was like "Gosh Annie* you look like a crack addict, your eyes are HUGE!"Teacher: Thats probably just because the lights were off. Class: erupts with laughter at our teacher's accidental implication. *name was changed to protect the innocent Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
diabolicalangle Posted February 25, 2008 Report Share Posted February 25, 2008 (edited) Kid in my physics HL class during a class on elementary particles: "Do any of these particles move faster than the speed of light?"...most of you probably won't get it. If you don't get it, ignore it cuz you won't find it funny if I have to explain it to you. i got it... and this is physics HL? lol On Valentine's Day IB Psychology SL, my teacher thought it would be cool to teach us the psychology of attraction. He mentioned "When you are with someone you really love, your pupils dialiate. Its a scientific fact"Student: Oh that makes so much sense! I was at my boyfriend's house the other night and he was like "Gosh Annie* you look like a crack addict, your eyes are HUGE!" Teacher: Thats probably just because the lights were off. Class: erupts with laughter at our teacher's accidental implication. *name was changed to protect the innocent that freaking hilariious nice sig btw Edited February 25, 2008 by diabolicalangle Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
flsweetheart422 Posted February 26, 2008 Report Share Posted February 26, 2008 that freaking hilariiousnice sig btw Thanks. I owe it all to koolgecko91 who made it for me. Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Posted February 26, 2008 Report Share Posted February 26, 2008 Offtopic: Taking requests...lolOntopic: *After math GENIUS misses question* Teacher: I reccomend you just dop out and apply for a job at Burger King. Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
PuLsE Posted February 26, 2008 Report Share Posted February 26, 2008 Okay so this is for people who are taking biologyOur bio teacher was lecturing about the Kreb's Cycle and he made a pretty lame joke"You know how ships are named after women? Well NADH is named after men, like nads" Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
bescherelle Posted February 27, 2008 Report Share Posted February 27, 2008 Chem teacher:Teacher "a catalyst is something that speeds up a chemical reaction, but it's not involved in the reaction itself" Student "um.. can you give us a real life example?" Teacher "sure, i tell my daughter to clean up her room, she says no, i ask her nicely, she still says no, so then, i take out my belt and and ask her again, she run up to clean it." Student "O.o" Teacher "see the belt it not never touched her, but it speeds up the reaction." thats the exact thing my chem teacher said as well! lol and the funny thing was he had a brown trinny accent . Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
bescherelle Posted February 27, 2008 Report Share Posted February 27, 2008 Chem teacher Teaching PhysicsWell it was kind of funny at the moment lolTeacher: Does anyone what vector displacement is?Student: no not reallyTeacher: (Starts running around back and forth to explain it)Class Laughing lolTeacher- You see what teachers have to do to explain things to studentslol Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
lorenzo Posted March 2, 2008 Report Share Posted March 2, 2008 Not really a quote but it was one heck of a funny day... My chem teacher, while doing a demonstration of the reactability of group 1 metals with water, managed to set off our school's fire alarms 3 times in a 1 hr period... it was hilarious, the whole school evacuated onto the oval each time, but by the third time people were like schmeh.. im not walking all the way down there again... whats more, the other chem class that was on at the same time also managed to blow something up and there was a huge scorch mark on the the ceiling... i never actually found out what they blew up tho.... then at the end of the lesson, my chem teacher said "guess what guys, next lesson, i'm guna be doing another demo. You kno that video I showed you last week about thermite reactions? I'm guna do it for you next time." everyone was like Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
IBStuck Posted March 2, 2008 Report Share Posted March 2, 2008 (edited) Not really a quote but it was one heck of a funny day...My chem teacher, while doing a demonstration of the reactability of group 1 metals with water, managed to set off our school's fire alarms 3 times in a 1 hr period... it was hilarious, the whole school evacuated onto the oval each time, but by the third time people were like schmeh.. im not walking all the way down there again... whats more, the other chem class that was on at the same time also managed to blow something up and there was a huge scorch mark on the the ceiling... i never actually found out what they blew up tho.... then at the end of the lesson, my chem teacher said "guess what guys, next lesson, i'm guna be doing another demo. You kno that video I showed you last week about thermite reactions? I'm guna do it for you next time." everyone was like first things first... don't do the reaction inside... it is extreamyl dangerous... if i remeber correctly it burn at or abouve 3000 degrees C!!!! now...you mentioning ther thermite reactions remindes me of something that happened last yer in HL Chem I. we went outside to do a chem reaction... and the student who picked what we were doing wanted to show us thermite. he makes it at home himself, but we found some hidden in the storage clset at school. so we got a couple flower pots and a big bucked of sand and the chem tacher tried to set it off with some matches, but it wouldn't work so the students who's idea it was to do the rection siad you need to use sparklers... they work. the two chem teacher kept saying no the matches will work. after going through the 1/2 the pack of matches they decided t use the sparkerls that the student pulled out of his pocket. they worked right away. the student showed both of the chem teachers. wat was ebven funiter about this was that you are told at the begining of the year not to wear flip flops in the chem lab, and you have to have close toesd shoes... well both of the teacher had on flip - flops this day.... her are pics of setting up, the reachtion, and after the reaction... the pic i have during the reaction sucks... it just doesn't do it justice. Edited March 2, 2008 by IBStuck Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyro Posted March 2, 2008 Report Share Posted March 2, 2008 This is a quote straight from my TOK book, I found it funny so I thought I'd share it . ironically it's under the a section titled Truth- " . . . during the Middle Ages, everyone thought they knew that there were seven 'planets' orbiting the earth. . . . They were wrong: we now know that there are nine planets orbiting the sun." Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
IBStuck Posted March 2, 2008 Report Share Posted March 2, 2008 This is a quote straight from my TOK book, I found it funny so I thought I'd share it . ironically it's under the a section titled Truth- " . . . during the Middle Ages, everyone thought they knew that there were seven 'planets' orbiting the earth. . . . They were wrong: we now know that there are nine planets orbiting the sun." well when it was writen that was proly true..... they need to have it updated. Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.