I'm dying because of maths HL

[Littlelostattimes]

Hey,

I am in my second year for IB DP and most things were quite alright, not good but alright, except for maths. When I first joined the DP program, the IB coordinator was keen to let me study English HL but my dad didn't like that. He suggested I try for the Maths HL entrance exam and try out for Maths instead. Amazingly, I never used such a high tech calculator before and my strong point was in algebra, that's all. I kind of blanked a few craps during that entrance exam. I was doubtful if I could ever study maths well. I joined a maths program called "Kumon" (google it ^^) for 10 years and spent 4-5 years just working on the same level for maths. Simply to say, I literally sucked horribly at maths. It's like asking a chicken to speak English to a cow or whatever, I just suck.

I cried in my maths mock exams knowing I screwed up and was confused with probability and statistics. I ran back to my dorm after the exam and texted dad "I'm sorry I failed maths again" My dad blamed me for not studying well for maths, not studying enough. He spent the whole weekend just yelling at me every single second to study maths. I was exhausted from my exams and my friends felt bad and took me out of my house to just breathe. They called my parents to let me out or I would be crying my eyes off in my room all day. My dad specializes in maths and teaches in a university. He told me that this was just elementary maths and maths is easy, he'll teach me and I'll understand it. The thing is we often argue when we study maths together. My dad didn't have much attention teaching me and he gets frustrated by my stupidity. He blamed me saying that it was my attitude, I'm just rebelling against him because I hated maths. Well no idiot would risk their diploma just to fight their parents. It's sickening just to think about that. I hated the fact that my dad said I had a choice, I made it. I didn't. I was just confused and persuaded to do so. He called the maths teacher to set me up for the exam and my maths teacher said alright and my dad said take her and let her study maths HL. When argued over the summer break because my maths teacher regretted **** and recommended me to switch to SL. My dad went to the extreme of threatening to remove me from the DP program that time. Today we argued again, he said just do whatever you want, I made a mistake sending you to the IB, just go ahead and rot all you want. I really want to switch. I'm so scared of tomorrow because I don't know what to do. I plan to take English HL but I fear the unknown. I'm scared what my teachers would think of me and especially my dad. I'm literally stressed out.

[Sandy]

Hey,

I think you should take english HL and shift to math SL, that is if your school will allow now. I don't know how to help you out exactly because I don't know you that well, but since you posted this question here, I'm gonna give it my best shot.

It takes a lot of strength to go against your parents, but its not your fault that you don't understand math as much as you do english. Everyone has different strengths and math is just not yours. And that's nothing to worry about. I think you should sit down with your father and have a conversation with him about how you're putting in everything you have and that this will end badly. Forget about all the times he blamed you, remember how hard you worked and how he doesn't know that.

Switch to english HL and put your efforts there instead. You'll have to work your ass off since the exams are approaching, but at least the result will be better. You can always PM me if you wanna talk or ask anything, I'll be happy to help.

[Siddhakshi]

I switched from maths HL to SL in my second year of IB as well. I had a similar problem where I just couldn't cope with maths and my parents wanted me to continue with HL. I spoke to my career counselor and my DP coordinator and they called for a meeting where they explained why I should drop to SL. Sometimes parents need to hear it from someone else to really believe it. It seems like you tried to talk to your dad and he still didn't listen, so maybe if someone else talks on your behalf it will help.

 

In my opinion, if you can't go for a subject, you shouldn't force yourself to take it. And if you like English, you should take it at HL! 

 

Don't worry And best of luck!

[eross]

Hey,

I am in my second year for IB DP and most things were quite alright, not good but alright, except for maths. When I first joined the DP program, the IB coordinator was keen to let me study English HL but my dad didn't like that. He suggested I try for the Maths HL entrance exam and try out for Maths instead. Amazingly, I never used such a high tech calculator before and my strong point was in algebra, that's all. I kind of blanked a few craps during that entrance exam. I was doubtful if I could ever study maths well. I joined a maths program called "Kumon" (google it ^^) for 10 years and spent 4-5 years just working on the same level for maths. Simply to say, I literally sucked horribly at maths. It's like asking a chicken to speak English to a cow or whatever, I just suck.

I cried in my maths mock exams knowing I screwed up and was confused with probability and statistics. I ran back to my dorm after the exam and texted dad "I'm sorry I failed maths again" My dad blamed me for not studying well for maths, not studying enough. He spent the whole weekend just yelling at me every single second to study maths. I was exhausted from my exams and my friends felt bad and took me out of my house to just breathe. They called my parents to let me out or I would be crying my eyes off in my room all day. My dad specializes in maths and teaches in a university. He told me that this was just elementary maths and maths is easy, he'll teach me and I'll understand it. The thing is we often argue when we study maths together. My dad didn't have much attention teaching me and he gets frustrated by my stupidity. He blamed me saying that it was my attitude, I'm just rebelling against him because I hated maths. Well no idiot would risk their diploma just to fight their parents. It's sickening just to think about that. I hated the fact that my dad said I had a choice, I made it. I didn't. I was just confused and persuaded to do so. He called the maths teacher to set me up for the exam and my maths teacher said alright and my dad said take her and let her study maths HL. When argued over the summer break because my maths teacher regretted **** and recommended me to switch to SL. My dad went to the extreme of threatening to remove me from the DP program that time. Today we argued again, he said just do whatever you want, I made a mistake sending you to the IB, just go ahead and rot all you want. I really want to switch. I'm so scared of tomorrow because I don't know what to do. I plan to take English HL but I fear the unknown. I'm scared what my teachers would think of me and especially my dad. I'm literally stressed out.

 

okay, first of all, I want to make a very important point: you are not your father. He might like maths and enjoy them and think they are easy, but you are an entirely different person with a different set of things you like and hate. So while your dad might think maths are easy, you don't have to agree- you are perfectly allowed (and not only allowed! it is your right) to hate maths. 

 

That said, I'm going to tell you what I told a lot of other people: you should only be in maths HL if a) YOU love maths and enjoy them (or maybe not love but they are easy enough for you) or b) you absolutely need the course to enter a particular university that you want to attend (and even then, I think there are a lot of universities with easier entrance requirements). 

 

You've said you hate maths and they don't come easy to you- then drop to SL. YOU are taking the IB diploma, not your dad, not your teachers, and YOU know what you like and what you don't- so what they think has no reason to affect your choice. I know it's hard to think you're disappointing people you respect and love (like your dad) BUT if you make choices about YOUR OWN life based on other people's thoughts and opinions, well, you are not going to be very happy. It takes strength to stand up to your parents, but sometimes you have to be strong and do it anyways. 

 

Take English HL, since that's what you like, and drop to Maths SL. Intelligence or stupidity isn't measured by how well you do in maths (or any subject for that matter), and numbers and grades do not define you or how smart you are. You might want to talk to your guidance counselor if you feel trapped or like every choice you have is the wrong one. And you really need to have a calm, adult conversation with your father- sit him down and tell him that you don't like maths, and are having a really hard time, and that you really like English, so that's what you're going to take. You need to tell him that you've put in all your effort and that it isn't about lack of trying- (and remember, it is NOT your fault!) and that you're unhappy. 

 

Put your efforts on a subject you actually like! Good luck! I'm here if you want anyone to talk to, so if you feel like you need to vent to someone, don't hesitate to PM me

[thecsstudent]

No maths class is worth that much stress and panic. I know it's easy to say but do drop math HL and do English no matter what your father says. Since you're in the IBDP you'll be an adult soon so you won't have to rely on him for your decisions in the near future. If it stresses you out that much see it as something that has to be done and take it one day at a time with your dad. He might not be very understanding but he definitely loves you and is interested in you. 

[Littlelostattimes]

Thanks guys for motivating me and offering to help me through a hard time. My dad really tried to help me I know. I didn't reply earlier because I had to take time away from this matter. I talked to my dp coordinator about switching subjects but he said he sent our subject n details to the IBO during December last year so I guess there's no choice but to work on what I can do now. Reading what everyone has said really made me feel a lot better ^^ Thank you :')

[kw0573]

Thanks guys for motivating me and offering to help me through a hard time. My dad really tried to help me I know. I didn't reply earlier because I had to take time away from this matter. I talked to my dp coordinator about switching subjects but he said he sent our subject n details to the IBO during December last year so I guess there's no choice but to work on what I can do now. Reading what everyone has said really made me feel a lot better ^^ Thank you :')

You can still switch, but I do not recommend it because 1) there's a hefty fine 2) you can't do HL English in a few months. 

IB Math is not representative of your permanent math abilities. The strictest HL Math teacher at my school recounted a former student who scored near the bottom of the class and was the top of the class in university. 

The logic that "not studying enough" is flawed. But similar logic if you don't get 7 in all your subjects you are not studying enough. This is invalid argument. You have to recognize this, mostly importantly your father has to acknowledge this. I guess by now you and your father have somewhat reconciled. So the next thing to do is to prepare for your exams. 

I guess the only way your father can leave the issue is if you score better on math, so here are some tips for HL Math

1. We best grasp new concepts while it is fresh. Do at least some of the homework the day you learned the concept. Consistency always trumps inconsistent, marathon-modes of studying.

2. You should not be using IB questions to practice the concept. Do "repetitive" or "no-brainer" questions to understand the procedures before you tackle IB problems

3. IB dictates 1 minute / mark. Your goal, as of February shouldNOT be that. You goal right now should be doing all (most) problems without looking at notes/solution, without time constraint. Time contraint is easy if you know what you are doing first.

4. Develop a habit to check over your work multiple times and look at the answer key only when you are mostly certain you have the correct answer. This is the next best thing to do when there are problems you don't know what to do.

5. During homework there may be some extra challenging problems. Don't just skip these, try at least 1 of them for each problem set/homework assigned. If you have an hour and the problem might take an hour, just do it. Connecting back to number 3), if you see the same problem the second time it's gonna take much less than an hour but if you haven't see it yet you are very unlikely to get the answer on the actual exam. For the majority of the papers, IB just repeats the same question types over the years so most of the questions are fairly predictable. The parts you haven't seen before (at least 1 such question on each paper) you are just have to hope that what you accumulated by doing the challenging problems, is enough to get you through the question.

I hope that explains some of the mindset of a "successful" HL Math student. Best wishes to you!

 

[Littlelostattimes]

Thanks kw0573 I did reconciled with my dad so thanks for everyone's encouragements. Before I talked to my IB coordinator, I tried talking to my maths teacher while he was going through the mock exam papers with me. He showed me my strong points and my weak points and tried to encourage me too. We had a week's holiday after the exams and my dad went through the maths topic with me. It's a bit pressuring to be honest but yes, my dad loves me and he believed I could do maths despite the fact that I really could not.  I can do a few more questions in the exam exercises my teacher gave me recently. I'm definitely gonna study hard and I will keep your advice in mind. Just reading it made me feel so motivated for maths  

Thank you guys!!! XXXX

[Fabio16]

Over the years that I have studied math, one thing that I have realised is that it is not meant for everyone. Some people just don't like it, and there is nothing surprising in that. It is actually a very weird subject. And I can understand your dad's viewpoint also as I myself being good at the subject have had to teach concepts to a lot of my friends. And whenever I see them struggling in a problem that seems to be very easy to me, I really feel angry. But then, I am sure that you are genuinely trying your level best to do well.

 

I would definitely recommend you to not go with a subject which you're not confident at. And especially math, because it is the kind of subject that needs strong basics right from the elementary level. I would strongly suggest that you fall to Math Studies SL (If it is not really an issue) because with the time that you have now, this is the subject that you will be able to prepare for well. And yeah, even if you feel that it would be difficult for you to handle English HL, trust me, it would be a 100 times better than Math HL. I think you should make your coordinator understand this and ask him to speak to your dad in person. Although there would be a substantial fee required for the change of subject, you should not change you decision on the basis of that because it is the matter of your career. (And that is what your dad needs to know)