Shame?

[Babydolleyes]

As far as I'm concerned feeling ashamed or shameful is purely self destructive.. Is there anything else to this emotion? Is it significant in any way shape or form? It seems so important when it comes to religion... does anyone actually interpret this emotion as a good thing? Of course it's important to see the error of your ways when you make mistakes and hurt people, but isn't that where guilt should come in? and not feeling ashamed?

Edited July 5, 2012 by Babydolleyes

[Shahad]

Hmmm, i don't think feeling ashamed is completely useless and self-destructive.

Felling ashamed is probably a natural feeling which one feels after doing something they are not proud of

So feeling ashamed would refrain you from doing the same action again and again.

So i guess you end up learning from being ashamed, right?

Feeling ashamed is a negative feeling which one does not wish to experience. Or at least that is my opinion.

So one would then seek to learn from their previous actions which led to being ashamed.

This would cause a person to somewhat change into a better person.

I think the feeling shame indicates humanity and morality lol.

Because if someone were not to feel shame after having done something terrible, then they feel no remorse and will not change who they are.

[Babydolleyes]

Hmmm, i don't think feeling ashamed is completely useless and self-destructive.

Felling ashamed is probably a natural feeling which one feels after doing something they are not proud of

So feeling ashamed would refrain you from doing the same action again and again.

So i guess you end up learning from being ashamed, right?

Feeling ashamed is a negative feeling which one does not wish to experience. Or at least that is my opinion.

So one would then seek to learn from their previous actions which led to being ashamed.

This would cause a person to somewhat change into a better person.

I think the feeling shame indicates humanity and morality lol.

Because if someone were not to feel shame after having done something terrible, then they feel no remorse and will not change who they are.

Yes very true, but I keep confusing shames purpose with guilts purpose, because wouldn't guilt function the same? I think there are so many people, myself included, that allow shame to hold us back in so many areas, perhaps areas where we have previously been humiliated or just had a bad experience in general, and because of that embarrassment it truly hinders ones future in many ways.. it's complicated, I guess. I just feel like ''shame'' lingers on inside people for too long, and limits us from daring to try things again. It just appears so self destructive. I guess feeling ashamed in very small dosages must be healthy, but it's a very fine line..

[Sandwich]

Shame is a pretty important function of social/group behaviour that allows us all to co-exist peacefully. If we didn't have a strong, negative emotional response to going against societal norms and feeling rejected by the group as a whole, we wouldn't all be able to live together and co-operate as we do. Perhaps nowdays it's easier to be shameless (...far too many people are...) because society works on a larger scale and you can actually get by without getting on with a single other person. In the era of celebrities, some people do things which are heavily judged and observed by the rest of society because it gets them noticed and actually they have sufficiently little shame to find the accompanying fame worthwhile. Back in the day when humankind was evolving through the darker eras of history, working as a group and following each other's rules and preferences was a bit more of a big deal in terms of survival. I mean people used to be punished for breaking societal rules through the process of generating shame - e.g. putting them in the stocks on public display.

I would personally distinguish guilt and shame - one is more moral and the other is more of a group dynamic based emotional response. If I feel ashamed I'm breaking more of a societal code than a moral one. You could say shame is purely destructive but you could also say that without negative responses such as feeling ashamed, we'd never be able to fit in and form a part of the group - which overall is 99.9% of the time a positive thing to do!