Kamen rider baron Posted February 17, 2015 Report Share Posted February 17, 2015 (edited) God went to the Arabs and said, ‘I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better.’The Arabs asked, ‘What are Commandments?’And the Lord said, ‘They are rules for living.’‘Can you give us an example?’‘Thou shall not kill.’‘Not kill? We’re not interested.’So He went to the Blacks and said, ‘I have Commandments.’The Blacks wanted an example, and the Lord said,‘Honor thy Father and Mother.’‘Father? We don’t know who our fathers are. We’re not interested.’Then He went to the Mexicans and said,‘I have Commandments.’The Mexicans also wanted an example, and the Lord said ‘Thou shall not steal.’‘Not steal? We’re not interested.’Then He went to the French and said,‘I have Commandments.’The French too wanted an example and the Lord said,‘Thou shall not commit adultery.’‘Not commit adultery? We’re not interested.’Finally, He went to the Jews and said,‘I have Commandments.’‘Commandments?’ They said, ‘How much are they?’‘They’re free.’‘We’ll take 10.’ Edited February 17, 2015 by Kamen rider baron Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
TykeDragon Posted February 17, 2015 Report Share Posted February 17, 2015 Lol, not at all racist, you should probably keep the jokes more playful and less offensive - I don't mind them but others might! I prefer this - from Bo Burnham's 'from god's perspective' : The books you think I wrote are way too thick.Who needs a thousand metaphors to figure out you shouldn't be a d*ck?And I don't watch you when you sleep.Surprisingly I don't use my omnipotence to be a f*cking creepYou're not going to heavenWhy the f*ck would you think I'd ever kick it with you?None of you are going to heavenThere's a trillion aliens cooler than youYou shouldn't abstain from rape just 'cause you think that I want you toYou shouldn't rape 'cause rape is a f*cked up thing to do(SPOKEN): (Pretty obvious, just don't f*cking rape people, please, didn't think I had to write that one down for you)I don't think m*sturbation is obsceneIt's absolutely natural and the weirdest f*cking thing I've ever seenYou make my job a living hell and I sent gays to fix overpopulationAnd boy did that go wellYou're not going to heavenEat a thousand crackers sing a million hymnsNone of you are going to heavenYou're not my childrenYou're a bad game of SimsYou shouldn't abstain from pork just 'cause you think that I want you toYou can eat pork 'cause... why the f*ck would I give a sh*t?(I created the universe, think I'd draw the line at the f*cking deli aisle?) Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yuki Kuran Posted February 17, 2015 Report Share Posted February 17, 2015 =( Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
behaaa Posted February 17, 2015 Report Share Posted February 17, 2015 yeah a less offensive joke would probably be better. Its still funny though Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kamen rider baron Posted February 17, 2015 Author Report Share Posted February 17, 2015 oh sorry about that guys Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baller97 Posted February 17, 2015 Report Share Posted February 17, 2015 God went to the Arabs and said, ‘I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better.’The Arabs asked, ‘What are Commandments?’And the Lord said, ‘They are rules for living.’‘Can you give us an example?’‘Thou shall not kill.’‘Not kill? We’re not interested.’So He went to the Blacks and said, ‘I have Commandments.’The Blacks wanted an example, and the Lord said,‘Honor thy Father and Mother.’‘Father? We don’t know who our fathers are. We’re not interested.’Then He went to the Mexicans and said,‘I have Commandments.’The Mexicans also wanted an example, and the Lord said ‘Thou shall not steal.’‘Not steal? We’re not interested.’Then He went to the French and said,‘I have Commandments.’The French too wanted an example and the Lord said,‘Thou shall not commit adultery.’‘Not commit adultery? We’re not interested.’Finally, He went to the Jews and said,‘I have Commandments.’‘Commandments?’ They said, ‘How much are they?’‘They’re free.’‘We’ll take 10.’ So are you saying all Arabs kill? All Mexicans steal? All Blacks not knowing who their real fathers are? All French commit adultery? etc.That's just really immature, closed-minded and rude. I didn't find it a bit funny or true. Would be better if you keep these sorts of "jokes" to yourself. Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kamen rider baron Posted February 17, 2015 Author Report Share Posted February 17, 2015 no I don't I am also of African descent. I'm sorry for posting such a thing, I know its not true, can mods close this thread Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kamen rider baron Posted February 17, 2015 Author Report Share Posted February 17, 2015 I would like to clarify, I am not racist in any shape or form Reply Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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